"But God..."

"God, what do You want from me? Are You asking me to give up this dream? But God, it's been in my heart for so long - a piece of me will die with this dream."

"I want all of you to die so that I can live in you. Will you give up your dreams so that my dreams for you will have the freedom to grow?" 

"But God, I like my dreams. I don't need big dreams. I am content with my small ones. Don't You want me to be content?"

"You are content only because you cannot see the bigger picture. Your imagination is too small."

"So show me the bigger picture."

"In order to see the big picture you must take your eyes off the small one."

"But God, You gave me that dream."

"No. I gave you pieces of a dream. You neglected to ask for my help and have put them together wrongly."

"But God, it hurts to die."

"I know."

"How do I let go?"

"By holding so tightly to me that it is not possible for you to hold onto anything else. Trust me as a small child trusts her human father. Crawl onto my lap, close your eyes, and fall asleep in my arms. Rest there, oblivious to the world around you. And as you sleep I will plant new dreams in your heart and they will grow, and when they are mature enough to bear fruit I will awaken you and show you the bigger picture."

"But God...but...but...but...God?"

"Yes?"

"I'm scared."

"I know."

"Daddy, please hold me!"

"I will."

"Don't let go."

"I won't."

"Promise?"

"Cross my heart."

  

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"Father I want to know Thee, but my cowardly heart fears to give up its toys. I cannot part with them without inward bleeding, and I do not try to hide from Thee the terror of the parting. I come trembling, but I do come. Please root from my heart all those things which I have cherished so long and which have become a very part of my living self, so that Thou mayest enter and dwell there without a rival. Then shalt Thou make the place of Thy feet glorious. Then shall my heart have no need of the sun to shine in it, for Thyself will be the light of it, and there shall be no night there. In Jesus' name. Amen."   -   Excerpt from "The Pursuit of God" by A.W. Tozer